We're on our own again, feeling like
little kids alone in the big city. But we're not little kids
anymore. We did pretty well all by ourselves in Aswan, give or take
a couple hundred euros, and we'll be fine in Cairo.
Last night we ate dinner in one of the
hotel restaurants. Our waiter was a nice, rather shy young man.
Each time he came to our table, I was struck by a mark on his right
hand. It reminded me of a disco stamp, but smaller. Emboldened by
my personal questions earlier in the day, which were rewarded by
honest answers, I decided to ask him about his stamp.
"What is that on your hand?"
I asked him as we were preparing to pay for the meal. "Is that
a tattoo?"
"Yes. I am a Copt. I love Jesus,
and this is the sign." He lifted his hand for me to look more
closely. Now I could see. It was the shape of a Coptic cross,
tattooed onto his hand.
I swallowed and let it out. "We
love Jesus too," I said, hoping that I was being truthful, at
least for myself. I have suffered so much because of the church!
But not because of Jesus. Yes, I do love Jesus, and I will not be
ashamed to admit this any more.
"I have three tattoos.
Would you like to see?" He lifted his shirt sleeve, pointing
to two other crosses.
This was the first
time I had heard of this custom. It seemed barbarian to me, but it
also showed amazing identification with Jesus. What impressed me most was his simple statement, "I love Jesus."
*
It's
morning, I'm still in bed, and I'm thinking about those conversations
with Mohammed and his friend. I'm perplexed, even shocked
about myself. How could I ever find any sympathy for the idea of
those two marrying? Have I planted an idea in their heads? I
certainly hope not. Have I lost my mind? Or my morals? What has
gotten into me? Sometimes in this country, I feel like I'm on
another planet, but I must admit, life on this planet has its own
sort of logic.
I'm a
firm believer in monogamy and would never want to share my husband
with anyone, and I can't imagine anyone wanting to share Mohammed.
And yet, the idea of polygamy doesn't seem so shocking, now that I'm
here. It's at least conceivable. Would I feel the same way if I
were parachuted into a fundamentalist Mormon sister-wife family?
None of what happened yesterday would have happened if we'd all have
been in Germany. No one would have asked me such a bold question as
his friend, and I would have been far too tactful to ask
questions about attraction and marriage. Has something taken me
over?
I've
been reading a book I bought in Aswan - Khul-Khaal,
by Nayra Atiya. In this nonfiction book, five Egyptian women tell
their stories. In almost every story, there is a man with at least
two wives. Reading their accounts, I see these women as victims of
this system. No one seems to really like it this way. No one wants
to be the one to have to share her husband. Sometimes the
consequences of living in a plural marriage are even tragic. In one
story, the first wife almost succeeded in killing the second wife's
son. This seems to be a very unhealthy institution.
I believe in people working to make their monogamous marriages
successful, and if they're single, to find happiness in that state.
I suppose the same kind of work, the same kind of mutual commitment could make a polygamous marriage work, but it seems to me that the entire motivation for such a marriage stems from either amorous feelings of a man, or a desire for children that the first wife can't fulfill. I believe that we are given divine help when we commit ourselves to
the well-being of our partners. When I got married, I vowed "For
better, for worse", and I still believe in this, twenty-seven
years later. I enjoy my married life in the better times, and I grow
in character as I accept and learn from the difficult times. This
has been my experience, one that I would recommend to anyone. I do
hope that Mohammed and his wife can continue to succeed in their marriage.
Today
we're going to check out bookstores with books in English. After
that, we'll go to the Egyptian Museum and look more closely at the
ancient treasures we saw in November, when Mohammed inspired us so
much we wanted to come back.
Peter
and I head into the center of the biggest city we've ever spent any
time in. The day is pleasant, if a little chilly. But Peter isn't
feeling well. The cold, windy air of Alexandria was too much. I hope
he's not catching a cold. Walking with Peter, I think about the man
I married. I have Peter's undivided love, all these years later. I
like - no, more - I love being the only love of Peter's life. There
is peace in that knowledge, and at this moment, I feel blessed.
We find
the bookstores we were looking for, both near Tahrir Square, and buy
some books to add even more weight to our suitcases. We have to buy
them - they're books you probably can't get through Amazon.
Dwarf Seneb and family |
Meidum geese |
Pharaoh Akhenatun and family |
Amarna tablet |
I
continue on my own, this time to see the famous mummies. Here, the
most remarkable thing is the fact that I'm standing so close to real,
ancient human bodies. Some of them have hair! One of the mummies is
Queen Hatchepsut, the famous female Pharaoh who engaged in trade
instead of war. Her mummy is 3500 years old. Her identity was
verified by a mere tooth, but experts are sure they have their lady. The
sign says she was obese and had diabetes. Too much rich food. Her
mummy was found only a few years ago in the Valley of the Kings.
King Tutankhamun and wife |
I feel
blessed, too, as I leave the museum. Now I am completely alone in
Tahrir Square. Not even Peter is there to protect me, but he trusts
in my ability to take care of myself. I want to go to a church
service at the church we attended on Sunday, Kasr Doubara, but the
service doesn't begin until 7 pm, and now it's only about 4:30. I
decide to look for somewhere to eat Egyptian pastry and drink tea.
The only
scary thing is crossing the thoroughfare at Tahrir Square, now
croweded with rush hour traffic. I stand there, hesitating, fearful
of crossing all this traffic. A young man walks up to me. "Do
you want me to walk with you?" Yes, I say. "Then you must
hold my hand." No, thank you. I will risk this on my own. I
dash across the road as soon as there is a slight gap. The cars slow
down for me - I'm not going to get killed here, in this spot where so
many protestors have been killed or injured by the police who are
supposed to protect them.
I feel a
wave of relief when I reach the other side. There is a pastry
restaurant I want to visit, but the challenge is much too great.
There are no street signs, no way for me to know where I'm going. If
I were with Peter, my map expert, I could get there. But I'm not
taking any chances here in this city. I look up and see the
Semiramis Hotel, just a few feet away. They should have a tea room -
and probably a good one. This may be Cairo's best hotel. I find a lovely tea
room overlooking the Nile. I sit down, drink tea and eat delicious
Egyptian pastries as the sun sets over the Nile. Our trip is nearly
over, and I feel a glow of peace. I am thankful for the rich
experiences we have had, for the protection we have enjoyed.
The
church is packed with young Egyptians, and the only language around
me is Arabic. I listen to a worship band lead the congregation in
praise songs. I recognize one of them, an old favorite of mine taken
from the Psalms, "As the deer pants for the water." I sing
along in English. The church sings one beautiful song after another, all in
Arabic. A young man volunteers to translate for me into English, so
I am able to understand the sermon, taken from Psalm 89. It is about
having hearts that thirst after God. He says we need to have a
desire like a romantic love for God. Those are the hearts that are
like David's, the ones that can receive God's blessing. I am
surprised to hear desire for God being compared to romantic love.
But then, what kind of feeling could be more intense, more lavish?
How Egyptian, how full of passion. We sing a song the man translates
for me: "I love you, I love you, I love you. You are my
master. You are the rock of my salvation. Your streams of living
water flow endlessly."
After
the service I meet the Korean woman I talked with after the Sunday
service. I learn that she is working with missionaries in Egypt.
She used to work with disabled children who live in the garbage pits.
Now she is working with prisoners. It's wonderful work, she says.
She loves her work, she loves Egypt, and would like to stay here
forever. I tell her I would love to come back and see her work.
"You will be back," she says. "You know the saying -
'If you have drunk from the water of the Nile, you'll be back.'
We'll see each other again here."
I arrive "home" safely, back
with Peter at the hotel. I find picture postcards for me on the bed
- one of King Tut and his wife, and the other of the dwarf Seneb,
his wife and children. Peter has written me love letters. God is
blessing us in our everyday lives, shining rays of love and blessing
on us, even at this moment. Although it is night, I fall asleep
soaking in bright rays of love and peace.
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